(Updated as of February 4, 2017) *LAST UPDATE*
The 5th Wave: A mediocre story with dull characters and below-average special effects. Very derivative of other films and novels. Maika Monroe is the only actor who has any fun. 5/10
10 Cloverfield Lane: One hell of a tense movie, with great performances from Mary Elizabeth Winstead and especially John Goodman, who is terrifying. Has a great ending twist. Greatly conveys a sense of isolation and a fear of the unknown. Little connection to Cloverfield. 9/10
13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers of Benghazi: A mediocre war movie from the mind of Michael Bay. Characters are pitifully one-dimensional and there is lack of any real excitement or tension, thus you don't care about their ultimate fates. A bit more mature Bay production. Historical accuracy possibly questionable. 5/10
A Monster Calls: At once a darkly whimsical and upliftingly sad film about how imagination is important but that we do have to grow up at some point. Plenty of great performances, especially from the child actor and Liam Neeson. Stories told by the monster have great animation. Like a darker BFG. Made me cry at the end. 9.5/10
Arrival: An uplifting sci-fi story about the power of language and how it brings us together. Great performances by everybody, especially Amy Adams. Fantastic musical score. Utilizes time travel in a way I've never seen. 9/10
Assassin's Creed: A convoluted plot and horrible direction make this the biggest insult to the franchise. Terrible action scenes. None of the characters have any personality, and all of the acting is mediocre. Attempts to be deep on the nature of man and violence, but it comes across as pretentious. 4/10
Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice: An unfun monotonous experience. First scene is promising, but the rest of the first half is incompetently put together. Second half is better structured, but still dull. The fight between Batman and Superman is completely lame. Jesse Eisenberg is horrible as Lex Luthor. Ultimate Edition barely improves the film 4/10
Ben-Hur (2016): A remake totally devoid of everything that made the Charlton Heston version the cinematic classic that it is. Horribly directed. Made Jesus more prominent for no reason and adds nothing to the story. Chariot race scene is horribly staged and shot. 4.5/10
The BFG: Whimsical and fun in the best way and is quintessential Spielberg. Great visual effects and musical score. Mark Rylance is perfect as the BFG. 8.5/10
Blair Witch (2016): Looks like just another one of the imitators of the original, and is just as lackluster and unscary as any of them. Generally poor acting. Makes the stupid decision to show the witch, even if briefly. 5.5/10
The Boss: Melissa McCarthy does a great job as always, but the material she's given is lackluster. The supporting cast is incredibly weak and they do a poor job at being funny. 6/10
Captain America: Civil War: The best film in all of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Has the best action, effects and acting of the films. Does a good job of discussing freedom vs. control with regards to accountability of one's actions. 9.5/10
The Choice: Poorly paced and uninteresting in every sense of the word. Trite and cliched as hell, thus no originality. Male lead is somewhere between douchebag and creepy. Scene where he asks the girl to marry him caused me to hate him. 4.5/10
Collateral Beauty: A total failure of dramatic storytelling that completely wastes its great cast, who at least give solid peformances. Has zero understanding of how people interact with each other or how grief works. Trailer is grossly misleading. Main plot twist is terrible. 3/10
The Conjuring 2: Dull for its first two acts, then it gets silly in the third act. Blows its scare load in the first 5 minutes. Not really that scary and gets over the top. 5.5/10
The Darkness: One of the least scary horror films of the year and wastes a solid cast. Awful pacing and crappy acting. The beginning and the rest of the film are separated by a few months, which makes things utterly baffling. 4.5/10
Deadpool: Hilarious allthroughout, with a healthy dose of reference humor and fourth wall-breaking jokes. Plenty of solid action. The funniest Ryan Reynolds will ever be. Is everything you could want in a Deadpool movie. 9/10
Dirty Grandpa: Horrible, disgusting jokes allthroughout the movie and is hideously unfunny. Robert De Niro is at his absolute worst here. Lasts for far too long. Only decent joke is a fart joke (how sad). 3/10
The Divergent Series: Allegiant: What it lacks in plot (meaning very little actually happens), it more than makes up in absolute stupidity. None of the actors are actually trying. Jeff Daniel's main goal is confusing and completely nonsensical. Very little action. 4.5/10
Doctor Strange: Great special effects and Benedict Cumberbatch's performance as Doctor Stephen Strange make this one of the better films in the Marvel Cinematic canon. Strange has a great character arc. Mads Mikkelsen is solid as the villain. 8.5/10
Don't Breathe: A very frightening and tense horror movie in a year so devoid of them. excellent sound editing emphasizes the characters' breathing. Last scene is a somewhat clumsy attempt at commentary. 8.5/10
Elle: A slow, but very enjoyable film about how we deal with our personal tragedies. Isabelle Huppart holds the whole movie together. My first foreign language film that I've seen in theaters. 8.5/10
Eye in the Sky: The tensest film I've seen in years. It excellently debates the moral, political, and ethical aspects of performing a drone strike. Managed to give me the feels. Great cast that give great performances all around. 10/10
Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them: Feels far too much like an introduction film and is lacking in intrigue. Has some solid visuals. Characters are serviceable. 6/10
Fences: A compelling adaptation of August Wilson's play that is rounded out by great performances. Doesn't transition that well from play to screen, so Washington could've done better in the directing. 8/10
Fifty Shades of Black: Completely and reprehensibly unfunny. Has zero understanding of how parody works. Zero consistency between characters and jokes. Stay away from it. 3/10
Finding Dory: A fun and entertaining family film, but is nowhere near as compelling as the first film. Plenty of beautiful animation. Marlin and Nemo didn't need to be in this one. 7.5/10
The Forest: A completely boring and generic horror film that doesn't even try to be scary. Doesn't make use of the history of the Aokigahara Forest to give it more of an identity. An absolute waste of time. 4/10
Free State of Jones: Matthew McConaughey is great as usual, but the story is only barely interesting enough to hold your attention. Has a pointless side story about the main character's descendant being in trouble because of his lineage. It doesn't need to be there. 6/10
Ghostbusters (2016): Can't live up to the original, but manages to be fun and entertaining enough to stand on its own merits. Weak villain. Special effects are passable. Kate McKinnon is the best part. 7.5/10
The Girl on the Train: Emily Blunt gives a great performance, but unfortunately she can't save a plot that struggles to have a decent focus. Has a solid musical score. 5.5/10
God's Not Dead 2: Manages to improve on the acting and the overall focus, the latter mainly by having fewer pointless characters and scenes, but everything else is worse. Contains the most cartoonish depiction of atheists ever in a film. Has no clue how the real world works with regards to schools or the constitution. 3/10
Hacksaw Ridge: An inspirational faith-based war movie made all the better by Mel Gibson's tense, assured direction and Andrew Garfield's great performance. First act is a little hokey, but picks up steam by the second. 9/10
Hail Caesar!: Is enjoyable, but seems more concerned with being a love letter to the Golden Age of film than having a substantial plot or focus. Great cast who are quite good. Has too many plots, and so has no time to properly develop them, especially the stuff with the Communists. One of the weaker Coen brothers films. 6/10
Hardcore Henry: Is balls to the wall crazy, and the first person gimmick sometimes works, but becomes disorienting for one scene where Henry fights many robots at once. Not sure how the first person gimmick actually adds to the film, could've been shot traditionally. 7/10
Hell or High Water: An intriguing, if somewhat unexciting examination of a grey moral compass. Chris Pine and Ben Foster work off of each other well. 7.5/10
Hidden Figures: A fun and compelling story about the 3 black women who were integral to getting John Glenn into space. All 3 leads are great and they play off of each other and the other actors superbly. Pharrell and Hans Zimmer provide an awesome musical score. 9/10
Hillary's America: The Secret History of the Democratic Party: One of the most fear-mongering, intellectually dishonest "documentaries" ever brought to theaters. Renactments are poorly acted and Dinesh D'Souza is boring to listen to. Constantly lies by omission. 3/10
The Huntsman: Winter's War: A pointless prequel/sequel that has no reason to exist. Underwhelming in many ways, especially the action. You will forget what happened not long after seeing the film. 5/10
Jackie: Natalie Portman is completely excellent as Jacqueline Kennedy. It's a shame that the rest of the movie is completely subpar in comparison. The film's framing device of an interview with Ms. Kennedy adds nothing to the film. Seems to meander from scene to scene with not a whole lot of substance. 6.5/10
Jane Got a Gun: An absolute snoozefest, with a story and characters that are almost impossible to care about. Wastes a great cast. 4.5/10
The Jungle Book: Has a pitch-perfect tone thanks to Jon Favreau's fantastic direction. Has the right amount of seriousness and lightheartedness. Outstanding cast and CGI. Idris Elba is imposing as hell as Shere Khan. 9/10
Kubo & The Two Strings: Absolutely beautiful animation and a great story come together to make the best animated film of 2016. Great voice-work elevates some solid jokes. 9/10
La La Land: The most joyous experience I've had watching a movie in a very long time. Filled to burst with great songs and an even greater musical score. Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling give great performances and have excellent chemistry together. Favorite film of the year. 10/10
Loving: A slow movie elevated by it's timeless message and Joel Edgarton and Ruth Negga giving understated, but great performances. Whole film is quite undramatic, as if to say that the couple in the film getting married shouldn't be a big deal. 8/10
The Magnificent Seven (2016): An otherwise average remake that is elevated by some solid performances and a solid climax. Good cast and set design. 6.5/10
Manchester by the Sea: A compelling drama about familial strife and grief that is wonderfully cast with great actors who all give great performances, with Casey Affleck giving an outstanding performance. 9/10
Moana: Another fun and enjoyable Disney musical with great songs and animation. Dwayne Johnson is a lot of fun as Maui. The story is told well, even if it's a bit standard. 8.5/10
Moonlight: Great performances are abound in this coming-of-age drama about sexual discovery, though as a straight middle-class white male, it's hard for me to relate. 8/10
Mrs Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children: One of Tim Burton's least inspired and most convoluted films to date. So many elements of the story have been done to death before, and the movie adds nothing to them. Asa Butterfield is completely awful in the lead role. Climax gets ridiculous with literal skeleton warriors that look terrible. 5/10
The Nice Guys: A really funny and entertaining black comedy/buddy cop movie. Ryan Gosling and Russell Crowe have great comedic chemistry. Well-paced. 8.5/10
Nine Lives: An unfunny cat video that is unfortunately feature-length. Ironic, because the cat videos shown at the beginning are the highlight. Feels like a cheap production and scenes seem to have been cut. Lowest point in Spacey's career. 5/10
Norm of the North: Awfully unfunny, terrible animation and some of the worst pacing ever for an animated film. Has a completely generic plot that was done much better in Happy Feet and the like. Lemmings try and fail to be like the minions. 3.5/10
Only Yesterday: A slow, but enjoyable film about a woman discovering who she is, both past and present. Great animation and voice acting. Could have been a little shorter. 7.5/10
The Other Side of the Door: Boring and predictable scares combined with a messy plot make this horror movie one to stay away from. Really silly on occasion. 4.5/10
Ouija: Origin of Evil: Some solid pacing and direction help this prequel greatly surpass its inept predecessor. Some good scares and the little girl manages to send a few chills down your spine. Ending is a bit silly. 8/10
Pete's Dragon (2016): A magical, well-told story that surpasses the original without even trying. Chemistry between the boy and dragon is great, and led to me having the feels at the end. Supporting cast aren't that interesting, though they give solid performances. Well-paced. Dragon looks fantastic. 8.5/10
Ratchet and Clank: Most of the jokes fall flat. Film is pretty harmless otherwise. Has a solid voice cast. TV-grade CG animation. Didn't really have to be in theaters. 6/10
Regression: A somewhat intriguing, but nevertheless a bit underwhelming film about the satanic ritual scares of the 80's. Has a good cast who give good performances. 6/10
Ride Along 2: Much like the first film, is an unoriginal buddy cop movie that plays itself to straight. Hart is just as teeth-grindingly irritating as he was in the first film. A bit funnier than the first film, but not by much. 5/10
Risen: Has solid acting all-around, but Joseph Fiennes is the best. Explores how religion can inspire. Solid production values. Avoids the preachiness and sentimentality that plagues most Christian films. 7/10
Rouge One: A Star Wars Story: An ok story and characters are complimented by some solid sci-fi action, but the film as a whole doesn't really have much reason to exist. 6.5/10
Sausage Party: Has solid laughs and performances that manage to elevate this existential Toy Story-but-with-food story. Has some decent animation. Satirizes religion to some degree of success. 7/10
The Secret Life of Pets: Is mildly entertaining, but not enough to warrant a second viewing. Has a solid voice cast and animation. Uses a familiar plot that it doesn't do much different with. 6/10
The Shallows: Blake Lively makes for a solid lead, but the premise is much too thin to substantiate a whole movie. Has very few genuine scares. 5.5/10
Silence: Martin Scorsese's passion project is an excellent film about the power of faith in the face of so much opposition and persecution. Great directing, beautiful, yet haunting cinematography, and a powerful score further elevate the movie. 9.5/10
Star Trek Beyond: Plenty of solid sci-fi action, but doesn't really have much of an identity asides from being a Star Trek movie. 7/10
Suicide Squad: A potentially fun movie that's brought down by a weak plot and uninteresting characters, few of whom get any backstory. Poor editing is obvious and sloppy. Margot Robbie as Harley Quinn is fun. Jared Leto's Joker is barely in it. 5.5/10
Sully: Tom Hanks's performance as Sully elevates an otherwise fairly standard biopic about the "Miracle on the Hudson". Crash and eventual rescue scene is well staged. 7/10
The Witch: Chilling, bleak, and a slow burn until the third act, then it gets brutal. The darkness of religion is heavily explored. Last 30 seconds could be the main character retreating into her imagination. Great camerawork and cinematography. 9/10
Toni Erdmann: A charming and sometimes funny examination of the bond between father and daughter. Leads are great together and Peter Simonischek is engaging to watch as both Winfried and Toni Erdmann. Could've been a little shorter. 9/10
Zoolander 2: Dumb, but not in anyway enjoyable and isn't the least bit self-aware, unlike the first film. Tries to overcomplicate itself with prophecy nonsense. 5.5/10
Zootopia: A really fun buddy cop movie that also doubles greatly as an exploration of racism and prejudice in our modern society. Teaches that we shouldn't judge people by who they are on the surface. Excellent animation and fun action. Jokes are hit and miss. 9/10
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