They're getting too old for this: An Expendables 3 Review

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           Of the two Expendables that have been released, I have only ever seen Expendables 2. It was a dumb, fun action movie that didn't take itself seriously, and that made it a joy to watch buff action heroes mow down bad guys with guns and fists alike. At the time I am typing this, Expendables 3 is not in theaters yet, but will be tomorrow. However, I've gotten the chance to watch it in its entirety early (I have my ways of doing so), and I will warn you now: It's not worth your 2 hours.

            Let's start with the fact that, yes, the movie is two hours, and only about a 1/3 of those is action, with the rest taken up by exposition and plot, which ends up making the movie slow and boring. Adding to this is that characters sometimes talk about death, growing old, and other grim subjects, which is really out of place in a movie that's supposed to be mindless action. For a good example of this, Antonio Banderas's character gives his backstory on how he and his old team were massacred, but he survived. This is really jarring to hear considering that Banderas is the only actor who seems to be having any fun.

            Speaking of which, all of the other actors, especially those returning from the previous film, act so apathetic throughout the film, like they're just doing this film so they can get a paycheck, which further sucks out the fun from the movie.

            As for the action scenes, they serve their purpose, but I wish there were more of them sprinkled throughout the movie. The only complaints I have regarding them are twofold:

1. The climax feels too long, and noting really outstanding happens in it
2. The special effects seem worse this time around. It might me, but that's what it seemed like

            The last thing I'll mention is Mel Gibson as the movie's villain. Originally, they were going to have Jean-Claude Van Damme play the twin of the villain from the previous movie, but they scrapped that idea. I wish they would've gone with that idea, because Mel comes off a less of a threat than Van Damme. He's less direct and is more willing to let others do the dirty work, which feels less intimidating. I also wish they would've exploited Mel's crazy side, that way we have a fun bad guy, and he'd probably come across as more dangerous.

           Overall, Expendables 3 lacks the fun of the previous film, and feels more grim than necessary. I give it a 5/10, which makes this a bad movie. Go ahead and skip it.